Have you found yours?

Hey guys,

I have an interesting story to share.

Once upon a time, there lived a 70 years old man, who lived alone in a small village. For 50 years, he has been working hard, just to get by a living. He has nothing in mind, and just wish he would get rich one day. And he waited for 50 years...

On one fine day, he went out to his land. He wanted to plant a tree. He brought a spade, and started digging the ground. Dig dig dig and dig... and suddenly...

He found something...

He was surprised!!

He never saw that before!!!

He doesn't know what it was!

He took a closer look at it, observe it, touch it, feel it, smell it... And he was SOO happy!

He discovered that it was....

Oil!

There was oil in his ground!

He immediately stop digging, and abandoned his plan to plant that tree. Oil was just flowing out from the ground!! He was sooo excited!

He called up the town's oil company, and informed them about the oil he found underground his house. The oil company came to his house the next day, and pumped out barrels and barrels of oil. The company paid him 10 million of the oil found under the ground of his land.

He was made a millionaire! His wish had finally come true!

He became a millionaire at the age of 70!. not bad yea. At least his dream came true.

but Wait!

.

.

.

Is he really a millionaire at 70 years old?

.

.

or 50 years ago?

YES. he was already a millionaire the day he lived on the village on the land with the oil underground. He has been sitting on this potential 'gold mine' for 50 years. And he only discovered this 'gold mine' 50 years later.

* This is just a story. Don't take it too seriously. Don't go and dig the ground at your backyard, and expect oil to spill out. Don't come and tell me that this is impossible, as oil cannot be discovered so easily. This is Just a story. Read the meaning, not the words.

So what do i mean from this story?

Everyone has his/her own inner potential. Everybody has his/her own hidden talent.

Your potential maybe at speaking, dancing, doing sports, leading, music, joking, singing... Anything!!

However, have you found yours?

If you have not, dun worry. You will find yours one day. However, don't wait it until 50 years later. Look for opportunities to show off your talents. Don't wait for opportunities to come and find you. They may come, but you may need to wait for 50 years also. But if you look for them, you may just find them the next day.

Many times, especially in the workplace, office, people always complain and complain, that their bosses never give them opportunities. Boss never send them to workshops, boss never give me a team to lead, boss never this never that...

However, if the boss gives him the chance to lead a team of 100 people, are you ready? if his boss gives him a project that worth $10 million dollars, is he ready to take it up?

I think hardly, cos he complains all the day, about not given opportunities. He never prepares himself, he never improves himself, he never learn new skills, to take on these opportunities when they come. He never give HIMSELF opportunities!...

Hey guys, I know you are not this kind of person. Always be prepared when opportunities arise, and Grab them! If you don't grab them, others will. "You think the boss will wait until he go and hone his leadership skill before he pass him 100 people to manage?'' Haha. Everyone knows this doesn't happen. Unless your dad/mum is the boss. HAHA

So guys who found their talent, use it, don't waste it, and don't let it suppressed by others.

For those who haven't, you will find yours one day. I believe, your talent lies in your passion. Love what you do, go do it, and it will be your talent:D

* I love marathons, do you? :P

Getting 'As' in school doesn't mean you can get an 'A' in life

Hey guys, below is a Must-read post by a 12th grader. He had just put all my ideas and thoughts about how schools are training us to become. It is an insightful post, and one that you MUST read. And i emphasize again, MUST READ.

Read it here.

So what if you have scored straight As from primary school to Sec sch to A levels to Bachelor to Masters to PhD? So what you have not? So What??

You must read this post. You will find the answer within.

That's the real meaning about life.

:D

First H1N1 case in Singapore

And finally. It has arrived. The H1N1 virus.

Who's prepared? Who's not?

After spreading for a few months around the world, Singapore has finally announced its first H1N1 flu victim. However, based on Singapore's government precautionary measures, the person is quickly quarantined, to prevent the spread.

The government is prepared. But how prepared are the people? Do we wear masks to cover out mouth when we are not feeling well?

Recent reports on ways to prevent spreading of viruses. In Japan and Hongkong, there's a common practice among its people to wear masks when they are not feeling well. They would wear it out to streets, on the trains, everywhere they go, until they reach their home.Why?
So they won't spread their viruses to other people.

Singapore? Nah. No one really wear masks. Reason... I look weird when I wear a mask on the streets. People may think that I'm very special, 'scared', feel outcast. ok. But what about covering own mouth, nose when coughing and sneezing? It's just a simple practice yea...

But not many people are doing that. That's most disgusting and most unhygienic, especially people cough out Loud in a packed bus or in a squeezy mrt cabin. What to do? I think unless you have a strong immune system, it is highly possible to get it.

Generally, we may think that the person is just coughing, nothing much. But this may not always be that simple cough, or sneeze we thought. They will spread. So...be responsible. Take care of yourselves guys:D

H1N1 won't stay for long, if everyone is responsible enough for their own actions:D

The Movie that will change your life...

Hi guys!

I hoped you guys like the insightful movie of "What the Wealthy, Middle Class and the Poor buys on Payday".

For those who have not watched it, get your ticket fast! The movie won't be shown here for long. It will be removed after 3 weeks. Get your ticket and enjoy it. I am 100% you will learn something different:D

Get your tickets here:

What the Wealthy Buy on Pay Day (English)

It won't be sold out. So don't worry:D

But the movie may just stopped for viewing after 3 weeks:D

Enjoy and catch up with you guys after the movie!

Contact me for problems of viewing, or sharing of opinions too:D

Who don't want Money?

Money Money Money...

Who don't want money...

I think everybody heard of the chinese/hokkien song...

"What if I have 1 million?''

so the song includes.. I will take aeroplane, stay big house, buy big car... and so on.. alot of things they want to get. True.. everybody wants to get that...if they have 1 million

However, after reading books and thinking back.. I came to a conclusion too...


'Money doesn't make somebody rich, Financial Intelligence does'

So what if Uncle ABC, with no financial intelligence, has alot alot alot of money, but he don't know how to manage it?...

Research and studies have shown, and everybody knows... People who get big money from windfall, lotto, lucky draw, lottery... lose that 'big' money as fast as they get it.

so when Uncle ABC won $1 million from lottery, he will want to get alot of things, even those he may not even need. How long can his wealth stays?

Money is a tool, and a financial intelligence is the toolbox. If you have high financial intelligence, meaning bigger toolbox, you can handle big amount of money. If you have low financial intelligence, ie smaller toolbox, you can't handle big amt of money.

So what happens? Your toolbox can only fit in the largest tool it can fit in. So what about the rest of the tools? It will be at other places.

Coming to back to a more realistic example, Uncle ABC has only earned $2000/month, and maybe keeping a regular saving of $500/month. He does not manage big money before, and the most he may see is his few tens of thousands in his bank, for e.g. And 1 day, he won $1 million!
He never see so much money in his life before. And so.. you guys noe wat he will do...
After..let say a few years, he found his bank back to normal... then what he do next?

He sees that $1 million can just come with just a lottery ticket of..let say $10. WOW. so what if I buy more tickets? I can win more millions! I can get higher chances of winning! And so he continue to buy and buy..and he hit!, sometimes $100. So he will tell himself.'' Oh! my luck is coming!! I think I should buy more tickets, higher bets.'' Then he buy and buy...

However, he dint see it coming, not even the little ones. But he want to win back all that he has put in!! What to do... what to do...

For this is an example for low financial intelligence, and its normal

Why normal? School never teach what... So we learn from our surroundings, the society... anything we think its right... and maybe from the media too...

Why media? I think you guys have watched news or seen on chinese newspapers..with headline...

"Who will be the Next Millionaire tonight?''
Story would continue saying many people are queing at XYZ 4D branches, because these are the branches that has always won the top prizes..and has made alot of people Millionaires. And that's why alot of people are queing, and hoping they would be the one tonight!

Stories like that always makes people think millionaires are created this way.

Eh brother!! If millionaires are made this way, why aren't they on the FORBES millionaire lists?
If millionaires are be made this way, why can't I find this on the list...

.. Bill Gates, Mircosoft, Software
.. Warren Buffet, Berkshire Hathaway, Investing
..
.
.
.
.. Uncle ABC, 4D/To-to, Lottery?!?!?!

haha. interesting isn't it?.haha.

Millionaires are not created this way. Millionaires are calculated on accumulated wealth, and net worth. And so you see... everybody wants money..no doubt, who doesn't want.. but how many of them are taking the correct route to getting them. The slow and steady, and not the fast and easy route?

And by saying that, it all boils down to Financial Education, to increase Financial Intelligence.

From the old, historic, best-selling book by Napolean Hill's "Think and Grow Rich"...

" Money without brains is dangerous"

Yes. This quote just explains everything.

So how to increase my Financial Intelligence?

You can always read business books, e.g. Rich Dad Poor Dad, Think and Grow Rich...
to increase your Financial IQ. However, most people seldom does these... they always got an excuse '' Read so much for what...''

It's normal. However, I've got a short movie to teach about MONEY. It saves you the time you need to finish a book.

''What the Wealthy, Middle Class, and Poor buy on Payday"

Click here to view What the Wealthy Buy on Pay Day (English)

Enter name and email address to get your FREE ticket! Rest assured your email would not be shared and given away.
I will put the link on my right sidebar, so you can get your free ticket anytime you want to. :D

If watching this video will 'waste' your time, and think its 'useless', I recommend that its better to press the "Back" button on the top left hand corner of your browser... and continue to look for BIG prize lotteries!!

Till then :D

I love failures. Do you?

Fail. It seems to be scary word.

Remember in school, no students like to see this word on their work, especially exams. When you see tat, you will think of "What's next" to come...

Parents scold?

Meet the parent session?

Countless times of correction?

Worse! Retain ?? Repeat another year??!?!?

haha. everybody've been through that..
and to prevent that from happening, we studied hard, do what we are supposed to do, so we would get all those...
and we will get...

Awards in Prize giving day!!

Awards by GRC!! money given out too!

Recognition in school! ( that's a math expert!)

Love by teachers

Name on School's ''Hall of Fame''

A holiday trip to the furthest country from Singapore

Yes!. thats all what we want right? Crazy. who don't want all that rewards and prize money.

I used to be someone aiming high up for honours also. I always want to get the highest in class. ( cos teacher will read out your name, and your friends will 'WOW'). I always want to get straight As for my major exams. Ha. I dint achieve all these though, but my standard is still somewhere there :P

All these targets in academic achievements are always what the parents would like their child to get in school. When their child get these, they feel proud among other parents too. They feel good, and everyone in the family feel good too:D

However, after years of aiming for high academic excellence, i noticed a pattern in those high achievers of academic success.

Yes. High achievers of ACADEMIC success.

There is one word that is never in their 'dictionary'. The word is

FAILURE.

yea. They are born to win. They have set targets for themselves to top, top, and only top the class, the cohort, the school, the country. Nothing wrong. They are driven to success. They aim high and exceed expectations. However, there is one thing I also notice in them...

They never allow themselves to fail.Never. If they fail, they will fall behind others, and will lose all those recognition, all those 'WOW' they get. They don't like it. Hence, they don't like failures.

And they get academic success! they get straight As. They get into top schools. They get top scholarships. That's in school.

However, life is never a simple route to walk. You always go through lots of obstacles. There are always challenges. There are always problems that sometimes you never expect to face. So what to do?

In school, when you do not know a topic, you can search a textbook. you can ask your teacher. you can study more about that topic, understand it, and solve that question. you can go for tuition or supplementary class. Then you master it, and know that question for exam.

However, what about life problems?
What happens when they fail a subject? What happens when they dint get what they expect?(7 distinctions out of 6 distinctions) What happens when they got rejected for a scholarship?

Most often, if they are able to accept these failures, they will stand up, and try again, take failure as feedback, and start again. They learn from their mistakes, and accept failures as part of the game of life. After the failures, they learn their mistakes and come back stronger.

However, what if they can't accept these failures?
I think you guys know the answers too.

Some solutions include breaking down, giving up on life, changing from bad to worse as a person, seek revenge, or worse, and easiest...

Seek death.

Yea. I think alot of us saw these examples reported in news.

Students commit sucide because cant get into the top school they want. Students commit suicide because they dint do well in PSLE. Students break down because they dint get the result they have aimed for.(6 distinction instead of 7). And the latest, NTU student commited suicide.

Regarding the NTU, i prefer not to comment too much, as much investigation is on the way to find out the real cause.

But WHAT? 6 distinctions out of 7. And the student broke down, cry and cry for days? Maybe for us normal students, 6 distinctions to us seems like a godly gift and would even celebrate it for months. For that top student, it is a failure, as she dint get straight As for all her subjects.

The education system has indirectly cultivate the habit of elitism. If you are not among the elites, you are OUT!. If you cant get into top school, cant get straight As, cant get into TOP universities, cant get into TOP courses, you are OUT!. that's all the belief by singapore parents.

But what kind of children have they produced? Their children are taught to score 90marks and above, 89 not accepted. They are caned when they fail. They are reprimanded when they play. They are scolded if they dint do well in tests. Trained Elites.

What if they cant get their dersired job after graduation? Don't tell me they go and complain to the boss.
What if they cant get government scholarship because someone else get it? Don't tell me they go and complain to parliament.
What if they don't get a promotion after years of working? Don't tell me they go and kill the boss.
Accepting those as failures and try again? Hardly.

I used to have an elitist personality too. I aimed to get the best. I get the feeling of being the best when I top my class for my first time in Sec4. i got the "WOW". People look at me as their mentor. You get to showboat your skills.

Up to JC, I aimed for academic and CCA excellence too. I manage my time, study and play, and get quite good grades too. As usual, I got that "WOW" from my class. Always called me when they got problems. I will help them, so i get more "WOW".Haha. My form teacher buzz ard my academic success, and even my choir teacher knew it. I feel good.

I aim to do more things, taking up 2 CCAs, soccer and choir, and other activities to make my future resume looks good. With all these, I aim to get the "STUDENT of the YEAR" award. Its quite easy for me actually, considered I have done alot in CCA. Just left for my A levels to get 3As.

In the end, I dint get. I get 2As. I felt disappointed. i let down the teachers who have high expectations on me. I felt I could have done better. I went to the College day to get CCA award, but dint feel good, as the "Student of the year" award doesnt belong to me. It hit me, and I was quite lost that time. I dint get what I had aimed for. But I dint think much tat time, as I was in NS.

So into NS, I wanted to achieve more, to make up for the awards I missed in JC. As an A level holder, I am expected to be promoted to 'SGT'. Yes. Expected.

But Unexpectedly, I dint get. I was denied a promotion. As an elitist, I couldn't accept it! How to accept this shit? All my qualified A lvl friends get Sgt, with a $300 increase in pay. Those who are so damm lazy during trainee days also get. I, who dint get any MCs, and never miss any workdays, never came late... not promoted. What is this? How to accept?

That was the lowest point in my life. I was damm down. I wanted to 'do something' to tat guy who denied me. Whenever I met up with old squadmates, they always asked "Why you never promote?'. This kind of question, I just have to swallow my guts and answer. Its embarrassing, its demotivating, its intimidating. My friends just got to probe and probe. Cos they never see this thing happen b4.

From then on, I begin to see true life of corporate world. Your life is determined by someone above you. He has control over your life. Its not ur results, not ur performance, not ur behaviour. If he doesnt like you, he can say anything to you, and That's iT!. He just don't like you, and even if u r perfect, he will find faults in you. Can't find faults, create them.

My elitism takes a hit. I cant get Sgt like my friends. Im a lower rank than them. And until then, when Im at the lowest point of NS, I picked up that Adam Khoo's 'Master your mind, Design your destiny' book.(I talked about this book alot of times already.LOL. Read previous posts to find out more:D) From there on, I got my new life. And so on...

I don't favour elitism anymore. I don't go for high IQ. I go for high EQ instead. So what you get an super high Mensa IQ? Does tat mean that you are a people-person? Does that mean that your boss will like you? Does that mean that your boss will put you on the Promotion List 1st?

If these people think so, they can spend their next 10 years and try. No matter what, they have no control of the promotion, unless the promotion is based on RESULTS and PERFORMANCE, which seldoms happens. Policticking has to be a criterion too.

Politicking? It just a nicer word for suck up, carry balls ...etc.. you guys noe better.LOL

Now I don't favour elitism, high IQ. I like failures instead. I like people who have failed in their school, faced multiple setbacks, and survive in life. I'm not being a racist, but I can see malays, even though many of them dint not go JC, they have far far far far more EQ than those JC freaks.

I worked with them at airport. Im impressed with how they connect with the public so easily. They aren't afraid of shyness, aren't afraid of how people look at them when they handle case. They made alot of friends in workplace and outside, and they are never lonely. I like to work with them. They helped their friends alot, and are never selfish. These are people who will survive in the game of LIFE.

Elistists, they think they are superior than others. They think they are so educated that only people of their standard can talk to them. They speak their own language. They can hardly connect with the public. They have few friends, who are also elitists in their class. They think for themselves, just like how they are tuned to top the school, no matter what.

Haiz. I feel good leaving the class of elistism. It jus feel so great. There are alot of things to achieve other than academic success. Success in school, doesnt mean you will achieve success in life too. Game of Life is full of obstacles, challenges that some will fail. Elitists don't like. They like to go for things they are 100% sure they won't fail. And that is why...
you see many of the elitists are professors in school. They love studying and achieving good grades in school, cos thats what they are good at. They hardly fail, and they mostly win.

To conclude this, as this is quite a long post...

I love failures, and I hope you too. You have to learn to fall from a bicycle, before you can be a cyclist. You have to struggle in the pool, b4 u become a swimmer. You have to cook multiple dishes of tasteless food, before you make a great one. You have to fail before you attain success.
But sad enough, school doesn't teach you how to fail. Life does.


Have something to say? Comment it:D

Treasure your friends

The month of may..
its still early, but there are alot of things happening already.
There are happy things happening, as much as sad ones..really sad ones.. that have somehow related me...

on Friday, 8/5/2009,
In the morning when i just woke up to a super heavy big rain, i received a call from Daanesh, my police friend. I thought he must have something good to me, as always when he called me. I picked up, and his tone sounds funny. Its not his usual happy and joyus tone.

He ask me if i noe Faruk, a police teammate from APD also. Of cos i noe. He's from TPJC, same soccer team for 1 yr, same police 126th intake, same division. We were once teamed together on standby at airport for some ASEAN Summit Event in 2008. I asked what happened.

He told me he passed away this morning.

I say haha. He told me its real, and not a joke. From there on, i started to listen more to him. He met a bike accident that morning, and was sent to the hospital. He died on that day early morning. He told me he saw Xiwei, another of my police friend, started posting comments on faruk's facebook.

I went to see his profile.

Its real, its true. He really moved on that morning. I told Daanesh we will meet at his house void deck, where his other friends are. My heart sank. I have just lost a friend. He's well-liked by everybody and i still can remember all the days when im working at aiport as a partol officer, and he as a admin officer. We always joked whenever we met, about police, sentry, A.ng, Oc pat, anyone..

And when back to TPJC sch days, we played 'A' division soccer together, even though he just played a few games in midfield. We also made fun of Nordin's accents, while talking.. syedzz, ding nengzz, ayukzz..every word with 'zz' behind.HAHA.

When I met up with Daanesh, there are also other of his friends, esp from airport and TPJC. And its quite sad when people gather in this manner. Only gather when something bad happen. Not for good times..

When his body arrive, i could recognise his curly brown hair. He's an arab, and ppl like to play with his race. But he doesnt mind, and thats why we enjoyed with him ard. I went up to his house to see him for the last time. I could still recognise him, with a few bruises and injures on his face. It's a very sad scene.

I can feel it. The pain of losing a good friend. There are alot of memories with him in airport and school. And much much much more his family and friends have too.


I have this photo for him. He's just the best no.17.

I still couldn't accept that he was gone. I dont think his friends can, let alone his family.


Thats on 8/05/09.
Rest in peace Ayuk.

Today, just.just.

I received a sms from timothy tan, my police squadmate from NS03/07, APD, and who used to sleep next to my bed. In feb, he left for australia, University of Melbourne for his tertiary education.

When i received his sms, which i thought at 1st was from aust, im quite surprised. But i read on..


He told me his dad has passed away on saturday...

Ouch. I saw him online and talked to him. He just came back from australia. This is very sad. He was in Australia then when he recieved the news. I will be meeting him at his dad's wake...


This May.

just 10 days passed, and in a matter of few days, bad news after bad news. When this happen.. Im thinking what's next only. What's next to come..

Life's fragile. When my grandma passed away, and when i saw so many people appear, i came to that thought. I think i have blogged tat b4...

Why must there be a funeral, or something happen, then everybody can gather together? This includes Long lost friends, your old neighbours, long distant relative, and many u have lost contact for many years. Why must wait for something to happen, den can gather n meet up? Why not on a more frequent basis, dun say everyday, but once every year is not too difficult rite?

At my grandma's wake, so many of my parents friends, their primary sch buddies, their secondary sch classmates, who never contact for 20+ years appear. Some had even lost contact, but received the news from friends of friends. Some of my ah ma old neighbours back at the old chai chee kampong appear. My ah ma's brothers and sisters also turn up, who i saw them when im in primary school. Why only now...

Many times, we took things for granted. I took things for granted also. We always thought everything, everybody will be there for us. We only think of the beautiful memories we had, once we lost it. We seldom treasure relationships with friends and family.

Sometimes, you always thought that you could have done more b4 the person left. but when u start thinking, Its too late... Then we start to regret. I did. And alot of people did.

It's good to start treasure your dearests ard us now, and do all the things we want to do for them, and have beautiful memories of them. We always want to leave beautiful and fun memories behind, and not regrets. Can we?

As it says: Yesterday is history, Today is a gift, Tomorrow is a Mystery.

...

March trip to HK!

Its May time!:D

Alright, before i go on, i missed out an important post in my previous previous post (that super long post).

There is a point i left out!. It's a post I went to Hong Kong in March for 3 days!

Yes! 3 days may seem short, but its a wonderful 3 days!. Anyway, being out of singapore for a holiday is the best, no matter how many days or where u go. LOL.

Back to hongkong 3 times! in 2 years. past 2 trips in dec 2007 and dec 2008, now in early march 2009, for a BIG BIG BIG event!. haha

Val's brother is getting married! and she will have a sister-in-law lo:D

Yes. I went to their wedding ceremony, from the church, to restaurant, to hotel, to everywhere. We followed everywhere the bride n bridegroom go. I took alot of pictures too, but not using my camera.HAHA. photos are from val and her dad's camera. All pictures can be found on FACEBOOK:D ya..ps ah, i dint post it here. They are all over there:D

I stayed at Val's aunt house too, with her aunt and her cousin. They are friendly people, and its nice talking to them, esp her cousin. Haha. 1st time talk so much to him. Dint really talk much past 2 times i went. ok la. we converse in english + abit of small canto.LOL. Their house is at 18th floor, nice view high up there. downstairs is a stadium and shopping complex, a bus interchange. Damm shiok. alright. i think u guys need pictures to visualise, but i dun think i remember to take them.haa. i try to find 1st..

The wedding night is very grand, and filled with happiness and joy, as seen in many people's faces, the bride and bridegroom family members and friends. Another couple tied the knot! Parents must be happy when their children got married. I think tats wat every parent want to see. Because this also means a promotion for them! They will be 'grand' parents next!

After this holiday, i came back to sg, n just wished i can be there longer.haha. nvm, i will be back again!. its just a nice place i must say:D I got to explore more abt that wonderful country:D

Alright. Im going 21 soon. Im planning to get married by 26. 26 is a good age. 1 year earlier or later also can, but definitely not over 30.haa.a bit old ah. not healthy also.LOL
So what's u guys ideal marriage age? Just say it out. Don't care u are attached now or not.
Attached now or not doesnt affect ur marriage age:D everybody is still young i think:D

Its May time! Start a new month fresh and get more out of this month!:D

ill be back soon!. yes. soon!!!

Laughter the best medicine

Hi guys, im back again.
After tat long post, i think its better to blog more regularly.Ha. But i dun mind writing long posts though. its quite fun actually:D

Finally, My friends have ORD-ed from NS. all of whom i knew enter in year 2007. Good Good! All of us have got back our much awaited freedom!. Even though im the 1st few to ORD, there's nothing much i can do, as almost 1/2 of my frens still waiting to ORD. So its not so good to ord early rite?.lol. alright. Enough of NS. its kinda sick to talk NS again.lol

So for tat, we had a celebration at Kenny house, to celebrate his FREEDOM from the force. We ate quite a lot, played quite a lot, laughed a lot. Its fun to have all the ORD-ed guys back again.LOL. Its just a tweak of the eye. and its gone:D. For guys going NS.. dont think too much. your time will come:D

So while Kenny ORd-ed, my brother got enlisted, on that same fateful day. haha. And its my first time taking a ferry to Pulau Tekong. I feel quite shiok:D . Got the feeling of going to Macau by ferry last december too. Funny thing before boarding, the NS clerk thought im the enlistee, just because i dress like the enlistees (t-shirt + jeans).

LOL. should have shouted ORD at him man. alright. Arrived at tekong, its a kinda Cool Island! I think its cool la, cos i enter as a Visitor, not an enlistee.HAHA. I don't think guys knowing they are posted to tekong, think tekong is COOL at 1st sight.Haha. For me, i can say im quite lucky la. hehehe.

My brother got enlisted to S coy, a coy i heard from fren tat its very good!. lol. so its quite lucky for him also:D so he will be back home on may 8th. 2 weeks inside. POC in june. He will make it, cos he's the 3rd one after me n my big bro to enter NS. Ohya, btw, my big bro going back tekong for Re-course after his Uni graduation in july, cos he yet to finish BMT during NS. sad for him man..

Alright, I have alot of fun with my friends this week, and i just love to hang out with ppl like them. Simple reason. I make them laugh, they make me laugh. And when laughter is around, you never feel bored, and never feel you are alone. Laughter breaks coldness between too. And I always love laughter, and always love to bring laughter to others. No matter how lame u can call me, I just love to see ppl laugh, cos when they laugh, i laugh, and everyone is happy:D
Laughter is still the best medicine:D

Ok its late. I will come back again soon with my new thoughts!

What Im up to for 3 months!

Hi guys! it has been quite a long long time since i blogged. I dint blog monthly as what i said last time. But im back here now.. and i promise a long post here today:D

Last post, January 30th . Today April 17th. Almost 3 months of absence. I make sure i write 3 months of content here yea:D

Let me start by saying what im busy/doing with these few months.

1) Meetings, meetings, meetings
2) Constant self-education
3) Online Business
4) Receiving valuable life lessons from love experts
5) Stopped Forex trading
6) Gym sessions
7) March Hk Trip
8) Planning my future


Lets start...

1) Meetings meetings meetings.
Yea. What am I meeting for? I go to my office at bukit merah , at least thrice per week to meet up with my business partners. 3-4 times per week, to and fro, from bukit merah and tampines. Spending at least 5-8 hrs in the office, $6 meals, $4 transportation everyday. 8 hrs in the office? Yea. 8 hrs in the office having discussions, meetings, exchanging of views. Pay? nope. No pay? Yes. no pay. Simple reason. We are in the office discussing business plans, strategies, problems, discussions... I'm not working for a baisc pay/ hourly-pay. You may ask me why am i doing all these w/o getting paid? Company using you/cheat you/take advantage of you? NAh. None of these answers. Simple reason. I'm not working for money. I'm doing all these not for money.

'' Wah, i worked 8 hrs/day and im getting paid 7/hr, $1000+/month, and you worked 8hrs and not getting paid. HAhA''

I'm not working, so Im not asking for money. We are in a business project. In a business, money is secondary. If money is the primary factor anyone go into business, the business will not succeed. Serious. The primary goal of a business is to make someone else's life better. In the process of making someone else's life better, money is earned. People pay for something which makes their lives better. Money is a tool, and never a goal.

It can be a great test for me, surviving on savings from NS after i ord. However, I have my own reasons for doing this. I dint not get a job immediately after i ord, because I want to get back the freedom i lost in NS. I dun wan to get tied down again, called back to work, applied for leave, answer to bosses, play politics. I have it all in NS, and its enough. LOL. The 2 week holiday at Macau/HK during december is just so great that I have got back all my freedom!!

I am not wasting time either! Not earning money doesnt mean I am wasting time. What I learn from all these meetings are more valuable than money, and I can say, priceless. And, I have a vision in mind for our business. I have in mind what our business will be in the future. I have confidence in it, if not I wouldn't have started doing it :D

All these while in the office, i get out alot from the meetings, discussions. I see that it is not easy to have your ideas accepted by the others sometimes. What you say may be good, but people may not see it directly. And here, you need your communication skills to sell your ideas across. Not easy, but can be done. I learn to make cold calls. (eh, not as easy as people think). Making cold calls, since its cold, you have to break the ice. (no pun intended). However, it's a skill which can be trained and learnt. Talking to people from cold market may be difficult at first. You will sound robotic while talking (memorising scripts). But the more you make, the more natural you are, as the scripts have become your vocabulary. As what Brian Tracy says, do what you fear, and you will remove your fear eventually.

I tend to speak more openly now about my objections and concerns, and not holding back, afraid that i may hurt people's feelings if people don't buy their ideas. I learnt that there is no point hiding if you have serious concerns and objections. Furthermore, it is better for objections to surface during meetings, so that everyone can solve it together. No point hiding away from it. It has to be solved sooner or later. It wont be nice to pointed out by others in the future. It just reflects badly on the management team. While doing this, I thought of my NS days. Then, people who give objections were criticised. They are seen as 'acting clever' or not accepting the other's ideas.

E.g.: Very often, you will see that your supervisor is telling the team to do this do that/ not to do this do that. While giving his ideas, objections are bound to surface. However, most of my team dare not voice out their concerns! What is this? What's so scarying about voicing out your concerns if you are not agreeing with the orders! Common answers: ' you dare you say lar!' this answers spreads around, people pushing responsibilities to one another, waiting for 1 brave soul to stand up for the rest of them. Me and my friend, Daanesh, just stood up and said our concerns.

What happens? The supervisor see us as not respectful to him, not obeying him, we as arrogant fellas, bla bla bla. He labelled us as 'bad apples', cos we make our concerns and objections known. Who wins? The supervisor (cos he don't want to lose. He don't want to accept ideas from someone of lower rank than him). The rest of the team thought they win too.(They kept quiet and hence they are still the 'good apples' of the team.) Both of us lost.

However, the fact is, only the supervisor wins. The rest lost. They have to do what the supervisor says, and even it was wrong/against their wishes, they still do it. Just because, they do not want to be in their supervisor's bad books. This is very normal in coporate organisations. And often, it results in back-stabbing, ball-carrying. Nicely said, politicking. Alright, enough of NS :D


2) Constant Self education
After finishing my first ever book in 19 years, I have a great passion for reading. Yes! Reading! but not storybooks. They are self-improvement books, sales books, business books. I have invested in audio CDs too. No offence to fiction book lovers, but its just self-improvement books/business books that interest me.heh

The Best Investment for anybody is to invest in himself/herself. Not stocks, not commodities, not foreign currencies, not real estate. It's investment in self-education.

After my first ever book-'Master Your Mind, Design your Destiny' by Adam Khoo, I have gone to read other books.

-Secrets of Self-Made Millionaires by Adam Khoo
-Tony Buzan' Increase your Memory Skills
-Think and Grow Rich, Napolean Hill
-Creating Wealth, Robert Allen
-What I learnt on my way to the TOP, Zig Ziglar
-How to talk to anyone 92 ways
-Rich Dad Poor Dad
-Rich Dad Increase your financial IQ, Robert Kiyosaki
-Trade for a living
-Swing trading the currencies, Kathy Lein & Borris
-Secret Psychology of Millionaire Traders
-Gureilla Marketing for Free, Jay Conrad Levinson
-The Art of Closing a sale, Brian Tracy
-Write to sell, the Ultimate guide to copywriting

Audio CDs include 'Little Voice Management', 'Psychology of selling' by Brian Tracy, and some highly rated CDs to improve my communication skills.

Other than the 1st 3 books that i borrowed, I bought the rest. The rest cost over a hundred dollars. Expensive? Yea. To me, it is expensive to buy a book that cost around $25-$30. However, that's in the past before i started reading. I used to think, ''How on earn can a few hundred pieces of paper cost $30??!!'' The price of printing the book is just a few dollars, and they sold it for $30, and some even at $40-$100++!! With $30, i can watch 4 movies, eat a good meal at crystal jade, or a buffet at sakae sushi/ Lao Beijing/Nihon Mura.(every non-book lovers think of that too..)

BUT not after I have bought my first book!! Even before i bought that book (which pulled me to Times over and over again just to browse it for free...), I hesitated alot. I am not sure if that book is worth my $30. However, when val saw me going back to Times, time after time, she told me ''Just get that book, Not that you can't spare $30.'' I still hesitated. I never liked reading before, and Much more, I never bought a book before in my past 19 years(2008).

And Poof! I bought that book! not at $30, but at $24, after a Times 20% discount. What a breakthrough yea? LOL. After reading it, i dont think it costs $30. not $24...
It cost much much much much more than that. It changed me as a person.
-I let go of my hatred in NS against that An.g
-I looked ahead of my NS life
-I see NS life as a challenge, not as a work.
-I see the importance of not wasting anymore time in NS
-I see the importance of fully utilizing my time in NS, improve myself, and not wasting time playing politics in the team.
-I learnt how to control my mind, not being controlled by it (NLP)
-I learn how to think and act like successful people
-I gained back my self-confidence after going through a hard time in NS
-Most Important, it gives me a whole new meaning in reading books. It let me understand the true meaning of books, and not just the few dollars cost of printing that book. Its the information.

Im wondering what kind of person would I be now, if I did not pick up that book that time, which has an great impact on my life. Would I still be playing politics with An.g? Would I still be someone who hated reading books, less buying it? Would I still be the one loving to waste time gossiping about people? Would I still be someone who has no clear future path in mind? Would I still be someone who dare not step out of comfort zone to achieve something? Would I still be someone who is very hesitant in making important decisions? Would I still be someone who never look or think out of the box for real opportunities other than following what everybody does?

Answer: Yes, if I have not picked my first book, and went on to read more self-improvement books. On top of that, i got a true real buddy, Seng BY, who got the same interest of constant self-improvement. Without his constant 'bugging me to follow him to borders', i would not have read more books highly rated by Amazn.com

Bottomline: Invest in yourself. Not just through academic education. I have wasted 19 years of my life not reading, and wonder what could i have learnt more, if i had started reading earlier.
Guys who never read self-improvement books, start now. You still have a great future to mould. After reading this, and you still think that reading is a waste of time, then i got nothing more to say. People only take action when something is taken away from them. That happened to me, and that's why I made a breakthrough today. :D

3) Online Business

This came to my mind after reading Secrets of Self Made Millionaire by Adam Khoo. Btw, I bought his Audio CDs at $147, along with all the bonuses. Waste money? nah, its an investment.
This open my mind! I came to understand that, there are alot of ways to make money, not just by working for someone else in a part-time job. Working in a job wont make u rich. It just allow you to survive. He discussed numerous ways to create multiple streams of income- and that's what make people rich!

From there, it discuss about making money online, which everybody thought its impossible. ( i thought that too, internet is just for surfing the information, play games...) But no! He opened up my immature mind! Its possible to make money online, and alot of people are doing that already! There are gurus like Ewen Chia, Adam Khoo himself, Stuart Tan, the lucky bastard AdamWong, Mark Joyner, Ken Evoy, Jeff Derick, Edmund Loh, Dylan Loh, Mike Filsaime, Mike G, Derek Gehl, Alvin phang... and alot more! you know what? i subscribed to the newsletters of the above Internet Gurus.

Its a whole new world now. Money can be made online. However, there are alot of online scams which people have to be careful too. These are just the spoilers in the internet marketing industry, just like any other industry where you can find scammers. But that does not mean making money online is impossible!

Now, im starting to build a new website, be an infoprenuer. I paid for it. Yes, money for investment again. Im gonna build a website to make money. Read again, it's build, not buy. Sometimes, you can buy a website , a ready made website from some internet marketers. Some claim just that website can make you $#&$*!#& of money within &$& days. Its not that easy like they claim. You need to put in effort too. Making money online is easy, but not without effort!! If you are serious about doing an online business, do it seriously. Invest the time and money required.

Looking for get-rich-quick schemes wont make you rich. It just scammmmms you!

4) Receiving valuable Love lessons from love experts.

yea. the love expert im referring to is Pastor Kong Hee from CHC. He is no doubt a great expert in love n relationships. I dun think i can learn it somewhere else. He talked about the top 5 needs of Men and Women. yea. What are these needs? i blog about them next time:D

Why do I listen to him?

Simply because, he is someone who has been there, done that, and succeeded at it!!

In life, there are 3 kinds of people.

No.1 - People who had read alot about the subject, but had never do what they says before.
No.2- People who had done it, but had failed
No.3- People who had been there, done that, and SUCCEEDED at it!!

Pastor Kong is No.3 He is a married guy, with a family and kids, a busy businessman, but with time to spend with his family and maintaining a good relationship with his wife. It is wise to listen to him!

Listen to No.1? an example would be someone who has read alot about love and relationships, seen alot of break ups in friends, and thought they knew all the reasons for break down of relationships... but they themselves never been in a relationship before.
Listen to them? HAHA...

Listen to No.2? an example would be someone who had a failed relationship, and come to help you solve your problems with your boy/girlfriend. He recommends you to break up, and he tells you that breakup can give u alot of freedom, give you a chance to play girls again... bla bla bla..
Why he tell you to break up since you got a problem? Because he had broken up himself, since he cant manage his relationship problem. If you succeed at maintaining your relationship with your boy/girlfriend, it only show No.2's inadequacy in managing his own relationship.
Usually, No.2 will say that ' he is trying to protect you' , but in fact, he dun wan you to succeed, if not, you have proved his inadequacies.

However, in life, most of the people listen to No.1 & No.2 in their decision makings..

5) Stopped Forex Trading

yea. I stopped forex trading. But that doesnt mean i gave up on trading. Even though i lost money in forex trading, i never say making money through trading is impossible, and tell others not to follow my footsteps to trade forex. ( sounds like a No.2 ? lol) Nah. Forex trading will give you financial freedom, only if you trade it properly. So here, I'm not discouraging people not to trade forex as i have lost money. But i just wan to say that proper training and discipline of the mind is important to achieve success in forex trading.

Forex trading is never easy. and its not difficult too. Why i stopped? I have too many commitments. I have a business plan on the way, self-improvement commitments, and an online business to build. I dont want to overload myself with too much stress. I look forward to accomplish a task, before taking up another, instead of taking all at once. Giving up 1 stream of income will allow me to concentrate on another 2 streams of income.

Trading Real money has made me learnt the importance of psychology in trading. Trading with emotions is not trading. Its just gambling. I have not reached that stage where i can sit still and trade. But i never say controlling psychology is impossible. It can be done, through discipline and training. This is one aspect which you cant learn just by trading with virtual points. However, i must admit i made a mistake of trading real money too early, before i have a strong foundation in forex trading.

No worries, once im done with my online & offline business, I will come back to forex trading to create that stream of income.

6) Gym Sessions

Going to gym. I never go to a gym more than once per month. But these few months, i went at least 5 times per month. Simply because, I paid for a membership. A commitment i gave to make me exercise, train, do weights. And with the money factor in, you will want to go to the gym as many times, to make your membership fees valuable.

Make a commitment. Im referring to people who always want to get desired body shape, but never do anything abt it, or people who set it as their New year Resolutions, but remain the same at the end of year. Make a commitment, by paying for a membership fee (like me) , or tell all your friends you want a new body( makes u embarrassed if u fail to do it) , or an extreme one- clear all the clothes in your room, n buy new shirts with 2 sizes smaller. :P

7) Planning my future

It has started. I know what my future will be like, what will i do, what will i not do in the future. I have planned and this is the best time to plan. Never start planning after you graduate. Never start planning when there's a recession.

See the news? Almost 55% of undergraduates graduating this year do not know if they got a job after graduation, due to the financial crisis. Ok la. Part of it due to the financial crisis. What abt the other part? blame economy also? LOL. why not blame themselves for not planning ahead 3/4 years back? Why wait for economy downturn then start planning? If there's no economy downturn, no need to plan?

There's still a small % of graduation, who are not afraid of the recession. Why? They have planned! Some had started their own business during sch years, making a living from their business, which means, they may not need a job that urgently like others!. I admire them. These people look forward to the future, and always have a vision of their lives.

Plan Plan Plan. Fail to plan , plan to fail. simple

Don't be too shortsighted or superficial. Nvm, i used to be one too. If i can look far, so can you, so can anyone. It just depends on you whether you wan to take action and start to plan, look out and far for your future, or stay in your comfort zone and wait for something to happen. take action, stop procrastinating!


Alright! its time for me to end this post. I startef writing at 11pm.. now its 3.20am. Wow. 4 hrs plus yea. But its ok la. i promised a 3-month content and here i deliver it :D If you guys think it shld be longer, just write it in the comment box, or in the chatbox. I write a longer one next time:D Feel free to give comments too!

Time to sleep! good night :D

How much are you willing to sell your time?

Oh!.

Chinese New Year is over..

its quite early, and ended quite fast too.. at least for me.ha

Lets celebrate again next year..

2009.
Jan will soon be over.

Actually quite recently, i received an email from adam khoo.( just subscribe to his blog and u will receive it)..

He talked abt..

How much are we willing our time for?. 5 years , 10 years , 20 years of our time?..
If you sell 10 years of ur time, ur age will fast forward to 10 yrs later ( 20 yr old-> 30 yr old)
So how much are you selling for?..
P.S. You have to sell..no matter wat. You have to give a price. You cant say priceless.HAHA

For his e.g., he say his friend is selling 10 yrs of his life for 10 million, so by doing calculations, its $114/hr , $1.90/min. Yea. If we really give such a great value for our time, are we doing things tat are worth that much?.. yea. thats a good qn to ponder over yeaa..haa

There are still ard 6-7 months b4 i start sch.
Quite a long time for me to accomplish some things.
I know what's there for me to achieve already..
And I will make sure I achieve it b4 School opens:D

For 2 months, I get to know the game of Forex( foreign exchange ). Its a game, but not exactly a game. It depends how u see it. If you know how to play this game, you will win handsomely. If you lose, it will be game over. And it is really GAME OVER!.

By saying this, people think its very risky. Some say its just like gambling. People who dun understand, of cos say its gambling!:D. Risk? It's contextual.

Everywhere you go, there's risk.
Doctor will tell you, probably of u getting stroke, is the same as probabilty of u getting knocked down by car on the road. So when you get a stroke, you cant blame the doctor!!. Because..he has told u the probabilty, and the risk already!. tats what happen to my grandma.

anyway, risk is defined as not knowing what you are doing.

Eating Fishball for you is risky?. LOL. Not for you. But for a 3 month-old baby w/o teeth, it is.
Swimming is risky?. LOL. Not for a lifeguard. But for someone who cant swim, it is
Driving is risky?. LOL. Not for someone who is a seasoned driver. Buf if he is drunk, it is. Because..
He doesn't know what he is doing!!.
So u can see what is the true meaning of risk?

We always watch tv, say people who play stocks, got their hands 'burnt'. So stocks are risky.
Have u guys wonder who these ppl are? Its the same as the buyers of Lehmann Brothers MiniBonds. I really pity those ppl. It's not tat they want to buy, they r being convinced by the bank relationship managers to buy those. How on earth can those aunties uncles read and understand and sign those contracts?

I have seen how ppl went thru terms n conditions with customers. You will always be presented with a few pages of Terms and Conditions. Then, the customer service guy, will Circle out the so called 'IMPORTANT' terms which u need to take note. Sounds famaliar?
Then, if u dun understand, they will explain to you the so-called 'IMPORTANT' ones.
Then, they will cross the underlined part, for ur signature, n say if u have no problems, u can sign. SO FAMiliar yea?

I get this before. I wanted to read n understand it myself. But he told me others not so impt, so he will ask me to take note some of the 'more-impt' ones. The 'more impt' ones are '' You must be 18 years old.' , ' You must declare that you only provide the truth..' .

When i read it again myself, there are alot of things he dint cover. They are the ' refund policy..' ' company not held accountable if wat wat wat..'' '' company not responsible if wat wat wat happends..'' They dint explain this. So arent they important?. LOL.
Thats wat happend to the aunties uncles who bought Minibonds. Contract stated there may be risk of not getting capital back. But you think the bank managers will say it?. LOL. they will just explain the high interest returns, building dreams for uncles aunties. Because, if they explain money may be gone, aunties n uncles will be FRIGHTENED!, so they wont buy the bonds!, and so...
no commission for the relationship managers!.
anyway, this is a sale tactic.:D

Sry for digressing.haha.

Forex can be risky, and can be not too. Its all about how to minimize risk. Its not gambling. For gambling, you cant minimize its risk. can you?. In gambling, the chances of winning is 50-50. However, in forex trading, its on finding high-probablity events. When probabilities of winning is high, the risk is greatly reduced, and sometimes, there may not be risk too. Gambling!. When people thought there are high-probablity events, and when they think of 'sure-win', sometimes, they lose all. Soccer gambling. Some may say..'' man u vs 'some stupid club' ''.. ppl bet 'SHOW HAND' man u will win. sometimes it draws, or even lose.

However, markets moves based on mass psychology. the saying goes ' the trend is your friend'. If u follow him, you benefit. Dont follow is ok, but dont go against it. haha.

Forex is not for everybody. It's not for you, if you r one who cant accept failures, You are one who must WIN all the time, You are one who cries when u score 7 'A' out of 8 subjects in A lvls, cos u miss out 1 A, You are one who gets everything you want, You are one who never let go, AND, you are one who always hope.
Rationale behind it is simple.

Dont believe?. Haha, you can ask any of ur friends, who fits the above criteria, and try trading. Any trading will do, options, forex, stocks, futures..anything. you will see:D

Alright. Talk soon!

Happy New Year! 2009

Hi guys

First and Foremost, a Happy New Year to Everyone Out there:D

its a brand new year again.2009

looking back, i started my NS in 2007, finished in 2008 nov. I have completed an obstacle which every guy has to go through in S'pore.

2008, even though there are successful things, happy moments, but overall, I still rate it a BAD year for me. For just 1 reason.

I lost my dearest grandma.

No matter how much I achieved this year, no matter how many happy moments i had this year,
the saddest moment which i wouldnt have wanted to happen, happened.

This year chinese new year, I would be missing out alot of things. Its not the money and red packets.Its the enjoyment of helping ahma to tidy her hse, putting decorations, filling up fridge with drinks, helping her carrying mandrin oranges from market, putting biscuits and sweets on tables. I will also miss out the smiles on her face, when all her sons(my uncles) gather at hse, with grandsons playing and running ard the hse, making her hse very lively. I will miss out the time she join us playing 'blackjack' and shouting together, laughing together. The chinese new year meals, with the tradition of eating the 'new yr fishes' that she will cook every chinese new yr and to serve relatives who come over..

All these will go into memory, and i am very sure nothing of this will happen in my life again, not again till im a father.

Alright,

I have also finished my NS, and have also reached my target of MCs. I can say for my police NS, i dint not learn any leadership, planning, or wat not from it. All i can say, there is nothing to learn.LOL. And all I learn is about working as a team, helping each other out, instead of back-stabbing. Other than that, nothing much. Hence sometimes u can see, esp regulars who work for long, they cant blend into the society, with others, most of their working styles are different from outside.

When i know abt this, i decided to spend my Time in more Productive stuffs. Stuffs which will be useful in my life, which is more beneficial to me than to keep on wasting time. I started reading, which i have not done in almost the past 18 yrs, and I FINISHED my 1st ever Book!.HAHA.

I have also met alot of different people, from differnt background, n also people with like-minded minds. Its sometimes a different experience talking to these people, and its not easy to talk to them too, as although same age, they know more things than us. This brings me to the mind of our current 'undergraduates to be' . Anyway, in my last post, I talked abt a friend of mine, who doesnt know and doesnt care abt current issues, current situations in the world, and just thinks with a University Cert, he can be at the top. This, i can say, applies to most undergraduates, who only think of hostels, night suppers with friends, skipping lectures, gossiping about lecturers, partying.... anyways, refer to my previous post ba:D

Alright, I might post my plans for 2009 in my next post:D

Good luck to everyone out there.
Make 2009 an unforgettable year:D

The world of 2008. Do you care?

Oh hi guys,

We are coming to an end of the year. 2008. How do you see 2008?. Ups and downs. More Ups or Down?

I think lets come back to look at it when we are in 2009 :D

Recent news about the world has somehow affected some of us. It really helps if someone is interested about what is going on around the world. However, as far as i noe, I dun see alot of ppl ard me really concerned about what is really happening.

Their answers will be like ..'' Don't know and Dont care''

It's quite sad to hear these kind of answers though. It just shows how well we know about the world. These ppl are just more concerned wat courses they are studying in the university, how well they want to do to go up dean list. But do they know what they are studying in university, may become OBSELETE when they graduate?

They will argue, '' once i noe I am the best in the subject, I noe i can get a job anywhere''

There's nothing wrong with the answer, and its is a very good answer. But the question is, how sure are you that the subject you studying wont become OBSELETE when you graduate?

We are all living in a different environment everyday. We dont know which bank may collapse tomorrow. We dont know which company will call for bankruptcy tomorrow. We dont know which company or industry will go into the history books. So many things happen everyday, and ppl are apathetic about it. They just know it's good to study university, and they are safe:D

I think many of you guys out there have seen friends regret the courses they have chosen to study for 4 yrs in uni. 4 yrs later, they say they should have studied '' ...'' , ''...'' . This is jus wasting of time. 4 yrs can do alot of things. However, they just have to accept the consequences.

Many a time, people chose subjects to study , with the wind. When the wind is blowing Life Science, all go life science, w/o fully what is lifescience to them.When the wind is blowing Business!, all follow Business! when they think business jobs can earn alot!. But when they went thru exams, they dont understand much abt it, they dont like it, they regret.

Just remember: Dont be led blindly.

Ultimately, all these comes down to how much you know abt ur surroundings, abt the world issues, abt ur region. If you dont know, you will just be led blindly. Information is priceless.

These goes to the same for our health.

If ppl ard you are apathetic abt current credit crunch, recession, it's still acceptable, as these wont kill them YET. However, if they are apathetic abt their health, and health issues, seriously, we got to wake them up.

If ppl are stil living in their own world, they will know that all milk are healthy products and shld be taken everyday, despite news told them abt melamime being contained in milk products. Not knowing wat is happening, they just continue picking same old milk products, and maybe they doesnt know wat melamime is.

If ppl are unaware of their country health problem, they may continue eating chickens, when they duno that 1/2 of their country's chickens have been killed becos of H5N1.

Most people, usually, does not really bother much abt anything, until something happens to them or somebody close to them.

When ppl know that wat they are studying will be useless in the society, they will start to panic and find a solution, and really go into deep thoughts wat they shld do next.

When ppl know that they have contacted some diseases/ illnesses because of their unhealthy eating habits, then they panic and quickly read up more on the illness, and finding cures to them.

However, do we know that sometimes it can be too late to realise it?

By the time you want to change your course of study, you are already in ur final yr. When you decide to change course again, study again, you may have lacked your friends by at least 3 more yrs. AND, how sure are you that your new subject wont be obselete/useless like your 1st subject that you have given up?

By the time you know you have cancer, do you think there is a 100% cure for it? Cancer is not caused by cancer itself. Cancer is just a symptom of the illness. When you have it, you read up more abt the illness, and then START taking precaution of ur eating habits. Do you think it has already been too late to watch your diet now?

People say '' Prevention is always better than Cure''

Agree. But how many ppl really follow this?

It's easier said than done.

Somethings have happened to me, and now i taking all the precaution to prevent it. Because I knew I have it, and I do not want to wait till that day to say '' I shld have..'' Its too late then.

I hope guys out there do the same too. Watch out for your health before its too late....

If you say you will fail, you definitely will!

Yea. I can say my cantonese has improved slightly. I can say from lvl 1 to lvl 1.1. yea. even though a small improvement only, at least i improved:)

At least i moved from 1 to 1.1, so i can proceed to lvl 2 soon!.

I did take time n effort out to learn how to connect sentences, any maybe new vocabulary.

It can be quite difficult at 1st, ppl may joke ur pronounciation, you may get stuck saying 1/2 way, people may look at you reading 'learning cantonese books' on busses or mrts, you may think you sound funny while saying it... alot alot of things that you are not used to.

However, Why I care so much abt ppl looking at me?. I learn for myself. Not For them?. Who cares abt the ppl on mrts looking at what im reading.LOL. I used to think alot of how people look at me when im doing things, but think again, what matters most is how u look at yourself.

If you think you are a failure, You confirm will be a failure.

No matter how others try to push you, motivate you, encourage you, YOu will still fail.

BEcos You think SO!.

Alot of people know this logic. However, you can see alot of people still doing it!.

e.g.

Looking back at sch days, how many ppl you noe, esp during O n A lvls, when they havent even tried to take the paper, they have given up hope on themselves, by SKIPPING the paper?

Its not that they cant do the paper, they choose not to do the paper. They give themselves way TOOO many excuses. i can quote some ''I dun wan to have a U grade on my cert, not nice'' ,

'' I want to concentrate on other subjects'' '' this subject not needed in my university admission''

'' I dunwan to waste time taking the paper''.. and alot more... you guys can see it urself.

They surrender before a war started..

If you can see, and u check with your friends.. How many of them can score alot more better in other subjects by dropping subjects? ohya, im not talking abt people who can afford to drop subjects. I m talking about those who cant drop subjects, but still chose to drop it. E.g. 3 A lvl subjects-> they just aim for 2 A lvl passes, so they drop one.

They are way concerned how other people look at them. They scared people may look at their 'U' grade, however, they they prefer a ' Ab' grade=> absent. tell me wat's the difference?

There's ALOT OF difference!.

A 'U' grade tells you how much you have learnt so far abt that topic, and how much you have not learnt. It shows you how unprepared you are, and how little prepared you are. It may show you your true weakness in certain topics which you have to work harder on, should you decide to re-take it again.

'Ab' grade?. shows that you are absent. It shows that you are afraid to take the test. It shows that your confidence level is low. It shows that you are unwilling to tackle difficulties ahead of you. It shows your true character : Give up easily.

So which one will you choose?

'U' tells u abt wat u really need to improve, and shld u choose to retake your subject, it will help you. Then you will concentrate more on subjects you are weak in, so you can work harder towards it, and certainly you will do better.

'Ab' tells you abt ur true character, your personality, more about yourself than your subjects.

Good!. not bad wat. you can see ur true self. BUT!. isit worth it?. You spend 1 whole year of study just to see ur personality? You pay examination fees of $100+ just to test yourself? Its not just $100 you are wasting. Its the TIME!. lets just calculate from the minimum..

Let's say you work in Macdonals!.

1 hr $4 ( i calculate the minimum)

1 day 10 hrs = 10 x $4 = $40

1 month= 28 days ( 3 days off) = 28 x $40= $1120

12 months= 12 x 1120 = $13440!!

And wait!.. You are working for just $4/hr.. and im sure you can get more than tat outside..

Other than this!. You are also wasting alot of other's people time!. and alot more. And, If you wan to really test your self, your character, u can go courses, go play games, or just go FACEBOOK!. alot of apps. for you to test.LOL

Hence, people out there, Before you give up on yourself, think of all these things 1st.

Seriously. 1 simple action of giving up is easy to do. Anyone can do. Just think of You are a failure, you will fail, and you will give up alr. Easy rite? this is power of ur subconscious mind:)

I ll end here 1st.

ORd-oh:D

A life-changing course

Hey guys!.

Just last weekend, 8/11, 9/11, I attended a course. A life-changing course. A course which show you your path to success. A course which brings out the true you. A course which show you what kind of person you are for the past 20 yrs.

anyway, I ord-ed on 8/11. I shall not talk abt Ord 1st. Im not so much interested abt Ord, and alot of my close friends have not even smell Ord yet. Its not very applicable to talk it now:)

Through this course, I have realised What a person I am so far in my life. and All i can say, I am don't have a big heart in accepting people's mistakes. A heart just not enough to forgive all people.

I am also not very serious in some things i do. And that's why i dint achieve what I wanted to achieve, and sometimes I took longer than others to achieve it. E.g. learning Cantonese. From last yr till this yr, I said I will learn it well, so it will be easy for me to converse in Hk, and it's good to learn too. People tell me its easy, since I know chinese words. However, I dint really make effort to learn it or talk abt it, since i think its easy. So till noW! Nov, i think i have just increased my Cantonese level, from lvl 1 to lvl 2 only. I can pick up canto words easier, and maybe understand more words. However, I still cant last a canto conversation more than 3 lines.

I am quite self-fish sometimes too, meaning think more of myself..than others. Others mean ppl i do not really noe, or my cold friends. I think more for myself, then my close n good frens then others. I tend to make win-lose situations than win-win situations. And from this course, i have learnt more abt it.

Above all these, there are alot more things I have learnt. alot alot more. I can say this course is way better than other courses outside. AND... its costs way less than others too. Its OverValued, and UnderPriced.

And now, learning so many things, its time to put it to good use. And everything has just started, not ended. Its time to start anew, and create my route to success. I shall not wait any longer, as time shall not wait for me.

From now, I Am On My Route to Success!!

Can you rule yourself?

Alright

My Com just got back to work. Crashed due to some downloads. I think i might get a New MacBook Pro Soon. Alright, back to my last posts, I say i will post my goals here. And here they are:

Long Term:

1) Financially Free by 28 - own car own house..

2) 1st mil by 25

3) Own apartment by 25

4) A personal car before 22

5) Married by 25

6) My Own Company By 26

Short Term:

1) Improve Myself in terms of:

- Communication

- Confidence

- Speaking

- Personal Grooming

- Motivation

- Presentation

- Financial IQ...

2) Pay for my parents, for a holiday trip- $8000..

3) Open up my Social Circle

Alright. These are my main goals. Some people may think Im dreaming, talk big only. Yes, It may seems Im really dreaming!!. But at least I dream!. People who dont dream will have NIGHTMARES.

Sometimes, What you target in your goals may not come true, but at least, you are nearer to it!. If you dont set goals, and work towards your goals, YOU will never get NEAR to it, but in fact, you are drifting further away from your goals!!

Another thing is about ACTION!. I think alot of people have heard this word ACTION ACTION everyday in their lives. From their Teachers, Parents, Brothers, Seminars.etc, but HOW many people are really taking action?. They know!! but why they are not doing IT?.

Just like i tell a fat guy:

'' You should watch your diet! Do not eat oily food or late suppers!!''

He will reply '' Yes, I know I know..''

Then, when he walk past Old Chang Kee, or some pastry shops, he will stop buy to buy some snacks to eat. THEN, when his parents bought some supper back home after dinner, He will have his share. After eating, He will tell himself, '' Shit, should not have eaten them.''

This happens to alot ALOT of people. Just like you know you got to study for your exams, and not slack. In the end, they slack, and give reasons like '' I need to relax, my brain jammed, alot of things to remember, brain canot absorb..'' to cover themselves. In the end when results come, They Tell themselves : '' I should have studied more, I should not have slacked so much, I should have practised more 10 yr series, I should have.. I should have..''

One Answer to all questions:

Humans are ruled by emotions , not logic.

And again, when people know humans are ruled by emotions, They continue to let emotions rule them. They dunno how to Control their EMOTIONS!

If you want average results, do what average people do. If you want to get excellent results, do what top students do. If you want to be poor, do what poor people do. If you want to get average pay, do what average people do. If you want to get what middle-income earners get, do what middle-income earners do. If you want to be rich, DO what the RICH do. If you want to get SUPER-RICH( e.g. Bill Gates, Warren Buffett), do what the Super-Rich do!

These few days while Im saying all these, Some people come and tell me, Im being Psychoed!. I Keep thinking of getting rich, Keep thinking of earning big money, Keep thinking of What What What..

So My Answer to them:

AT LEAST, Im being Psychoed to be RICH. YEs RICH. And I will be rich one day.

TO me, Being RICh is a possibility, but to most people, being rich is not possible. They rather use reasons like '' play safe, get steady job, have a family can alr, dun think so far, money is the root of all evil..'' to cover their poverty.

As you know, NOthing is steady in this world now, 158yr old bank also collapse. Put money in bank, Bank Dun wan to return you. What is steady now?. People say gahmen jobs alot of bonuses, and somehow like 'metal rice bowl', but yesterday news just said Bonuses for Civil Servants are being reviewed, due to drop in GDP, and they may not even get bonuses if economy does not improve.

So, make the correct decision before its too late.

Last buy not least,

Take ACTION.

Questions for thoughts!

On Saturday, I learn alot of things. I think they are just too much to be shared all here. However, I got somethings for you guys to think about...

1) What is your opinion of Selling?

2) Do you know that We are all born salesman?

3) Do you know God is a Salesman?

4) Do you know What are the BIG 3 Important Rules of a Successful Business?

5) Do you know the Difference between a scientist and a professor?

6) Do you know the REAL reason Why people study in University?

7) Do you know What is the ONE thing that a university graduate who earns $2500/month has, that a self-made millionaire of no tertiary education does not have?

8) Do you understand fully How the sub-prime crisis comes about?

9) Do you know Why some people can move thousands or even millions of people, just with their Words?

10) Do you know the 3 MOST Important Factors that made somebody so Successful in whatever they do?

11) Do you know the 3 Powerful tools in any business?

12) Do you know What are the 3 sought after Professions?

13) Do you know What are the things that Schools / Universities teach and DO NOT teach?

14) Do you know Why Books are so Important?

15) Do you know What really makes a person Rich?

Hmmm..15 questions.

Actually there are more, i just cant think of them now.

Anyone who know the answer, keep it to youself. However, if anyone wanna ask me the real answer, come forward and ask me personally:) I will tell you personally :)

If you never ask, you never know:)

These are just some food for thoughts. If you are interested to learn more, Come forward and ask me out, so we can talk abt it over a meal:)

Alright. I will post my goals in my next post!

My Ah ma...part 4

My grandma used to tell us 3 brothers, not to fight, not to fight, give way to each other. I think she had said at least a million times, when she onced bathed us when we were babies, till we become old enough to think, when my big bro go army, when i enter jc..

She bought my 1st leather wallet, my 1st bicycle, my 1st gameboy, my 1st gameboy light,my 1st gamboy colour, my 1st digimon, 2nd digimon when it was stolen, my 1st tamiya car, my 1st pro-yo, and alot more...

Whenever i visit her, she will ask if i had eaten. If not, she will quickly cook up some dish to fill up my stomach. She can really cook up anything. Give her some flour, water, and she can fry a kueh for afternoon supper. Whenever she had finished cooking the dinner, she will always call us to eat, n not to wait any longer. When we always say ' dan dan (wait)' , she will wait a while, maybe after 5 min, will call us to eat again. I missed that.

When we say wait again, she will be frustrated, and nag at us for not eating, n letting the food cold is not nice to eat alr. Then, we will only start eating, and ah ma will fill our plates with lots of food, and tell us to eat bao bao. After Dinner, she will bring out watermelons, or cut fruits.

After that, she will again bring out snack like biscuits, crackers to us. The thing is, she doesnt want to eat all these fruits and crackers, and always says she does not have strong teeth. However,we can see that she just want us to eat, n not get hungry overnight. n Tats why u see us 3 brothers become so tall, big sized.

We were all fed by our ah ma when we grow up. All 3 of us went to TAF clubs from pri school days. I went in from P2 till sec 4. HAHA. 8 yrs. LOL. Cant lose weight?. yea. My ah ma food is just too nice to control. They are not oily or fried stuffs. Its just tat i eat alot more for each dish.

Sometimes I wonder, why ppl say small kids dun like to eat vege, or they got the bad habit of not eating dinner. From wat i perceive, its not tat they dun like vege, or not eating dinner, is that the vege doesnt taste nice, or the food is just not nice. In order words, We 3 are just very fortunate tat ah ma fed us up, till we are bigger and taller than her.

When im in my pri sch days, ah ma used to fetch me from sch, if i have violin lessons tat day. She will meet me in my school canteen. Remember, that time not everybody got a phone. However, i still managed to find my ahma, and she still managed to find me everytime she say she will meet me.

SHe will carry my violin down for me, and has already prepared my lunch. It is contained in a metal food container, usually fishball noodles or porridge. Its just taste very nice. I will always eat so fast tat ah ma wil ask me to slow down. EAt slowly, no need to rush.

After eating, she will bring me to my violin class, and tell me not to run away, when class end. She will sit outside n wait for me. After my lesson, i will always run to ah ma, and she will bring me home. She would have a bao for me then, to ask if im hungry. It will usually be chao shao bao, or meat bao.

Every Chinese New Year eve, without fail, i will stay over at ah ma hse, will help her wash the kitchen, the living room, the corridors. I will help her decorate the house, prepare sweets, puttng them into containers, open up packets of drinks to get ready to serve relatives the next day.

She will then wake up very early in the morning, to get ready the food, especially, Red Dates Soup ( Ang zo Teh). That's just superb. It used Charcoal to cook. All the ang bao she give, doesnt come with ang bao. ''??". meaning she just give us cash, n say she just want us to listen to her, n not to argue among each other.

When all the relatives come, she is very happy. She always makes sure she serves them to the best, and will never go home hungry. And This year, only this year, 2008, due to stupid deployment in apd, i cant celebrate my 1st day of chinese new year. However, i still managed to stay ah ma hse the whole day on the 2nd day.

Alot of people console me, by saying she has gone to a better place. True, she has gone to a better place. She doesnt have to suffer the pain of being a stroke patient, she doesnt have to take further medication. She doesnt have to wake up early to do chores. She left with everything in the house still intact, including the wok she used to cook for almost 40 years, the coffee maker she used for 20+ years, the chairs she sat on the day she stayed in hdb(1978), and alot more things.One thing i can say, She left with a smile. She did not smile, even once, when she was in the hospital. However, SHE Smiled on the day She left us.

Ah ma, I will always remember you, always. You have successfully fed us 3 brothers up, and you have done more than being a grandma. You guide us. You teach us. You never scold us. Sometimes, you rather see us be happy, than you yourself are.

You rather let us enjoy the good food before you try. You never let us do the chores, as you want us to relax, but sometimes we still insisit. You never let us go hungry. You tell us, not to complain how messy our home is, as it is fortunate that we got a house to live in. You tell us, not to fight, or argue with each other, and always tell us to give in to each other.

You tell us not to argue or be fussy over small things. If others want to have it, let them have it. You tell us not to worry about exams, as Ah Gong will bless us, and will make sure we do well. You tell me not to worry about your driving test day, as Ah gong will make sure I pass. True enough, I pass, despite nearly meeting an accident.

My 1st dream after getting my license, is to drive to Your house, and fetch you, to come over to my house to have dinner. I made it. My 2nd dream, is to ask you to attend my wedding, and let you be a Great Grandma. I did not managed to do it.

Ah ma, rest in peace. I will always, always, remember you.

My Ah ma...part 3

Reference to last post, I spoke about the funeral being held for 5 days.

Yea. Its there for 5 days, and my parents and the uncles and aunts took turns to stay till dawn to look after ahma. I stayed once, and I did not feel tired, until 6 am. Its alright, as i have stayed throughout the night during my night shifts.

Every day, Every night, there would be visitors coming over to see ah ma. At one time, ah ma longtime friend of almost 60 years came. 60 years!! At first, she saw a funeral wake at blk 33, she thought it couldnt be my ah ma, since my ah ma lives at blk31. Due to lack of space , then we move to blk 33.

She walked into the wake, and looked around for any familiar faces. She saw my cousin, and my big bro, and this has somehow confirmed her worry that the person in the coffin is my ahma, her friend of 60 years. She walked closer and closer, to the altar, and when she saw my ah ma photo, she was dumbfounded and was rooted to the spot. She stood there, as she could not believe that the person lying in the coffin is my ah ma, and her best friend.

It was just too shocking and unbelievable for her. She sat down and had a chat with my big bro. My bro explained everything to her and she was sad when she heard what actually happened to my ahma. She broke down in tears. She came every night then, with teary eyes, every time she saw ahma's photo.

I can confidently say that almost 80% of the whole block of 31, Bedok South Ave 2 know my ahma, and almost 50% of the people in market and the stall owners in the bedok market know my ah ma too. Yes. My ah ma has alot of friends, and she has made alot of friends.

Everywhere in the market. I remembered in my primary school days, i used to stay on sat nights to accompany ah ma to the market on sun morning. Wherever she walked, she would stop and greet her friends. Along the way to the market, people would greet her and she would smile back to them.

When she reached the market, she would be greeted by her group of friends sitting down chatting. She would den introduce me to her friends, and her friends will flatter my ahma as her grandson is growing up. They would also joke with her, and say me, the grandson, so helpful, go to market to help ahma carry groceries.

My ah ma would chat with them for a while, den proceed to buy breakfast n groceries to cook for dinner that night. She would always worry abt my breakfast 1st. After buying breakfast, she would go inside the wet market to buy groceries. Every stall she patronise, the owner is my ahma friends. Yes. EVERY!. When she buy fishcake, as i like to eat, the fishcake uncle will treat me with 1 free fishcake, which i eat on the spot.

When she buy fishballs, the owner gave her extra. When she buy vege noodles, she does not have to queue, as the lady boss is her friend. and SEE!. my ah ma got such a great network of friends. And, i always feel flattered whenever i walked with ahma, as every of her friends will praise me.

One great moment that i enjoyed with ahma on our way to the market. When we walked to the market, we will walk past a fitness corner. The fitness corner will have the ' Stones' which are for u to step on. I brought ah ma there, as tat can help blood circulation to the body, but it will be a bit painful while stepping on the stones.

When ahma 1st tried, she walked with her slippers on, cos she say its painful. But i tell her '' Cannot!!, like tat not pain!.. must feel the pain den good!''

Then my ahma slowly took off her slippers, and i helped her carry tat. We then walked through the stones together, n i held my grandma to help her finish the stone trail. After completing the trail, my ah ma will show a face of pain, and she will ' wah!'. Then, i would ask her, '' ah ma SOng bo?.'' Then she will laugh and say '' SOnG song!'' She wore back the slippers and continue our way to the market.

During the funeral's days, I walked past this fitness corner, and it really bring back the great and loving memories i have with ah ma. The feeling was so strong, that i can remember the moments i played with ah ma, our funny expressions while walking on the stones. I'm feeling a sense of loss when i walked through the stone trail. I really want my ah ma to come back.

Whenever neighbours came to the wake, they will say the same great things about ahma, and with the same reaction when they heard abt what happend to ah ma. They would say:

'' your ah ma is a very friendly person''

''almost all the ppl in the block noe her''

''I saw her almost everymorning when i go to market''

'' She is a very hardworking person. I always saw her with 2 hands full of stuffs, and carrying them

all the way home''

'' She can run 2 markets every morning''

'' She is a very strong person''

'' Her cooking is very good''

'' She dotes on her grandsons very much''

''Your ah ma used to buy us food while we are gambling''

''your ah ma is a kind person''

'' your ah ma works alot. Back in the kampong days, she used to wake up early in the morning, to fetch 2 big pails of water''

.

...

there are just too many words to describe my ah ma alr. Too many.

Its late. I will follow up in the next post.

My Ah ma...part 2

Alright. I think this post got to be a super long one. If I cant end it, it will continue in the next post.

These few weeks have been a difficult week for me, and I can say it is the worst week that I could ever had, one that i would never want it to come, one that I would give up everything for it not to come. But it came.

My last post, 21 sept 2008, my grandma is still struggling with stroke. From day 1, I have visited her every day after my work, boarding bus from airport and take the train to outram, SGH. Everytime i went there, I just hope that the ECG ( electorcardiogram) is responding, the heartbeat and blood pressure are in the healthy range.

I would then heaved a sigh of relieve. I would then go over to her bedside, call 'Ah ma!, ding neng lai liao!!', hoping that she would respond. I would held her hands tight and give her warmth. I would try to massage her toes, to improve bloodflow, so in anycase she got to walk again in the future, it would be easier for her.

I would massage her thighs and muscles, to keep them warm. I would tell her not to worry, everything is fine, and you can go home a few days later. I would make your favourite coffee, cook your favourite mixed vegetable, fried fish, and anything you want.

Every evening I came, I did all those things, and also asked the nurse to take special care of you. I also hoped for the doctor to say something good about your health. The days are long, and every call or sms i receive, i received it with fear and anxiety. Everytime i open the inbox, I just hoped its not from my mum or my big bro, or if from them, it must be something positive.

on 25/9 evening, I came to visit you. I just knew that you had a blood transfusion in the morning, due to a loss of blood. The medicine, aspirin, that was given to reduce the swollen of the brain, has caused the thining of stomach wall, causing the wall to tear, and bleeding within the stomach.

The doctor discovered it the previous night, when the nurses changed the diapers. Blood was collected in the diapers, and blood was also immediately given to supplement the loss. The good side is that the swelling of the brain has stopped.

However, i realised that your heart is beating at an uneasy rate, beating ard 100-110. I saw you breathing in and out profusely, with lips flipping in and outwards. I sensed something must be wrong, and I asked the nurse. The nurse told me, it's a normal sign, as patient has just been give blood transfusion, and blood is just pumping faster to transport blood to other parts of the body.

Quite logical. Problem is, blood transfusion was given in the morning, and by the nurse, the heart rate is the same(100-110) since morning, till then (8pm) when i visit you. The nurse asked me not to worry, as they have given you medicine to bring down the beat rate. I then decided to leave alr, and hoped everything would be back to normal the next day. That was also the day, the only day, I did not massage your hand, fingers, toes, thighs, as blood vessels were connected to your body parts due to the transfusion.

I left with a heavy heart, as i think that something must be wrong with the increasing heart rate, even though the nurse says its normal. I just prayed that everything will be alright. Little did I know, that was the last time I entered and left SGH.

Early morning at 6am, 26/9/2008, my mum and dad all woke up and started getting ready to go out. It puzzled me, but i did not think too much. Then my big bro called me, and said that SGH on-call doctor called him, and told him that Ah Ma's heart was beating at 150-160!!, and it has been beating for almost the whole night!!!. It's equivalent to sprinting 100m race continuously for almost 6 hrs!.

From what I know, normal person heartbeat is between 70-80, and elderly at ard 60-70. Vigorous exercises may increase heartbeat. However, my Ah Ma is lying on the bed!! Why the heart is beating so fast then? When my brother called me, I'm very worried that something is wrong, and he was waiting for my mum n dad to fetch him up at ahma's hse, and proceed to SGH.

I'm just as worried, but i did not follow them. With heart pumping at 110-120 the night before, I could see how hard her breathing is, with her heart moving up and down, lips flipping due to the rush of air in and out of the mouth. At 150-160, i just could't imagine how she is reacting to the abnormal heart beat.

I stayed on the bed, while my parents and big bro rushed to SGH. Then, my phone sounded. 1 message received. It's the message that from day 3 (the day ah ma got stroke), till then ,

I DID NOT WANT TO SEE!!.. When i opened the message, it read:

'' ah ma passed away at 7am..''

I jumped out of the bed immediately, and shouted ' AH MA!!!!!!'. I gave a call to my big bro. i heard him weeping. He said they were caught in the morning jam, and doc had called them to inform them ah ma has stopped breathing at 7am.

When my big bro reached her bedside, she was not moving already, but there was a smile on her face. Yes, a smile. When he touched her hands, they were cold. No one was beside her when she left. We were told, that means ah ma dun wan us to see her leave, as she doesnt want us to worry. She left with a smile, which means an end to the suffering she has endured these 9 days......

They stayed to do the documentation and follow up. I sat in front of tv, switched off. What went through my mind was all the memories i had with ah ma, if calculated, it's just ' infinite' GB. My memories with Ah Ma were never ending, and I would say, Priceless. It's just too much, too many things, from the day i was born till the last day i heard her say the last words.

I dragged out a bag full of photo albums, and started looking for ah ma. I just couldn't hold back my tears when i saw her carrying the 3 of us, when we were still young, and when ah gong is still around.

It's just too overwhelming for me to take. I applied for emergency leave immediately, to request to see my ah ma again. I packed up, and went to ah ma hse. Memories just flow through my mind ceaselessly. I just couldn't imagine the world w/o ah ma.

When i reached ah ma hse, my dad was at the void deck. I asked where's ah ma's body. He said it's with the casket ppl, and they would bring her back in the afternoon. Meanwhile, workers were fixing the backdrop, the tables, chairs, everything that is required for a funeral. Ah ma's funeral was held 1 block away,at 33, as her block,32, does not have enough space for a funeral.

When ah ma's body came back, in a lorry, with her coffin, I was very emotional. It was wrapped and tied in plastic. A ceremony was held to put her body inside the coffin. Before that, they got to dressed up ah ma.

When they opened up the plastic, I saw ah ma. She was dressed in her usual attire that she wore to the market, simple brown old lady clothings with blue pants. From what i knew, that was what my big bro packed in my ahma's bag, and told ah ma to wear that attire when she was discharged from hospital after operation. Little did we know that She didnt walk out with that attire, but being carried out.

The scene was just SOOO sad and solemn , that i couldnt hold back my tears and cried. Needless to say, i think my big bro feels the most, as he was the one who chose ah ma's attire to wear out of hospital. Even though the casket people covered the scene they dressed up ah ma, I could see through from an angle, the smile on her face.

It just made my heart sank even more. A ceremony was then held, and ah ma was placed inside the coffin. The priest told us to say the last few words to ah ma..

Chi : '' ni bao wo ta, wo wui ni lao''

Eng: '' you carry me from young, i feed you till you are old''

Hokk: '' li po wa dua, wa qi li lao''

This is really the time when my heart really sanked into a bottomless pit. A time i cried the most. I time i just couldnt stop my tears. A time I just hoped it's a dream. I walked round her coffin, and saw the smile on her face, with her beautifully dressed up.

I stretched my hand and touched her shoulders, and told her to go peacefully, and not to bring any worries with her, as all of us had grown up, and will now take care of ourselves, and will do what you have always told us to do last time. We will live by your values you have taught us from young, and not disappoint you.

Coffin was then closed and nailed. We were told to turn back n not to see while the people nailed the coffin. Anyway, it's just a painful process. The funeral was held for 5 days.

Alright. I know this post is very emotional, and it also took me great pains to write out everything i remembered. I knew there are some more things which i can left out, as there are way too many things. I will continue in the next post.

Till then, see ya.